In this very special series of exclusive articles for The Property Chronicle, Australian property legend Norman Harker reflects on his extraordinary 50-year life in real estate. He will pull no punches partly because, as he freely admits, Norman has a limited life expectancy of five years from December 2018 due to a diagnosed terminal blood cancer, which he has cheerfully accepted in preference to (in his words) “kicking the bucket without notice”. We are honoured he has chosen us to publish these brilliant, funny and incisive reflections of a lifetime in property.
Arriving at the University of Western Sydney, I acquired the name ‘Captain Hook’. That was just one name in a batch limited only by the imagination of undergraduates. (‘Basil’, ‘Bean’, ‘Stormin’’). I still claim Basil & Bean took after me. My single-finger scratch of the nose is still remembered as a response to some student comments during lectures and tutorials.
Professor Millington had been farsighted and put the (then) latest IBM XTs or even ATs on the desk of every lecturer. Emeritus Professor Graeme Swain had equipped a computer tutorial room with 15 IBM XTs. The problem was that no one had thought about the software that I wanted. The leading firms in Sydney were using spreadsheets and word processing. I wanted to produce ‘oven-ready’ graduates, who could hit the ground running – ahead of or level with the profession as far as the application of technical skills were concerned.
“The department budget ran to coffee and an occasional biscuit”
We tried to squeeze money out of Graeme Swain. but his ‘price’ of increasing student:staff ratio was too high. The department budget ran to coffee and an occasional biscuit. Somehow, a ‘nod’s as good as a wink to a blind man’ copy of Lotus 1-2-3 appeared on every computer in the department and on every computer in the computer laboratory.
I’m livid today about software piracy, but in 1988 it was an accepted pandemic and even major software producers ‘acquired’ parts of others’ programs. Copyright holders fought for their justifiable rights.
With spreadsheets, the United States Supreme Court found that even Lotus 1-2-3, the dominant (98%) spreadsheet company, did not “come to court with clean hands”. The unconventional definition of NPV and IRR was from a spreadsheet program of the United States Department of Defence which, as we know, always get everything wrong.
1988 Lotus 1-2-3, 1993 Microsoft Excel
These ‘copies’, I ‘acquired’ did not come with user guides. I had to follow my nose through the menu system. It taught me that good interface design had to be ‘moron’ friendly because I am one. As an aid to my memory, I produced a route map through the entire Lotus 1-2-3 menu, typed it onto an A3 sheet and photocopied it for students.
I’m lazy, preferring slip-on shoes to lace-ups. Rather than keep adding files to each computer, I got the computer centre ‘Wizard of Aus’ to set up a TUTNOTES directory on the nascent network from which all computers could download my latest (ab)uses of spreadsheets and lecture/tutorial notes. Why TUTNOTES and not TUTENOTES? Directory and file names were limited to eight letters or numbers in 1992.
From that acorn grew the mighty oak tree of the university network. In the hands of non-academic administrators and their apparatchiks it became ‘Norman’s Bane’ that eventually forced me to decide to retire to peaceful penury, arguing, swearing and laughing only at my latest ‘mistress’, Pentium 9, with the go-faster CPU and gigaflops of RAM and storage.
“I decided to try to regain my virginity and go legitimate”
Around 1992, I decided to try to regain my virginity and go legitimate. I saw that Microsoft Excel was the superior spreadsheet, sitting nicely with Windows, and allowed the use of a mouse, which reduced my need to move all except one hand.
I asked Microsoft if we could have a free academic licence – we were producing graduates who would demand their program. They said, “No. We only sell full price or reduced price for large numbers of copies.” I then approached Lotus 1-2-3 and they said, “Certainly, sir.” I immediately corrected them. Only my garden had been invited to the Betty’s garden party and my chances of being knighted were zero. So we went with Lotus 1-2-3.
A few months later, Microsoft introduced a free academic licence for academics and students, but I had to say, “Sorry, you’re too late! We’ve got an agreement with Lotus 1-2-3.”
This lasted until 1995, when we changed over to an academic licence for the superior Microsoft Office suite including Excel, Word, PowerPoint and Access. This replaced separate software of Lotus 1-2-3, Word Perfect and DBase.
Software interface must be usable by this guy
An early question was, “Where do we ‘relax’ after work on Fridays?” This was met by quizzical looks except from Professor Millington. He knew of the ancient British custom of ‘relaxing’ on Fridays. We announced that we would all meet informally at the University’s Stable Square bar 5pm on Fridays and that staff, their partners and students were all welcome – until the police arrived.
One noted absence was a Land Economy Society run by and on behalf of the students. Eventually we secured its creation by a group of ‘likely’ students. They solved the initial finance problem by arm-twisting of parents, etc, for prizes for a raffle. The star prize was a car!
‘Overlooked’ in the publicity was the fact it was my car. That was a prize of negative value. It was only held together by Stop-Rust and because the spiders were holding hands. Yul Brynner had more tread on his head than the tyres.
The ‘winner’ of the ‘fixed’ raffle duly put it up for 50/50 auction. He also donated his 50% to the Society. The successful bidder paid $50 and over the Christmas/New Year long vacation used his part-time employer’s facilities to renovate the car, which he then sold at a handsome profit.
A Ford Falcon in its better days with a good owner
Land Economics, of which valuation is just one discipline, attracts highly sociable and resourceful people. They initiated various functions, such as the pub crawl and the Land Economy Graduation Ball, which was subsidised by sponsors and funds generated during the year.
Thanks to this spirit, UWS became the place to go if you were serious about becoming a professional in whatever area of the multi-disciplinary, multi-location and multi-use part of the profession your inclinations, skills and fortune led you into. My colleagues and I only ever insisted on one attribute – integrity.
A university experience should be more than just gaining an award by an aggregation of miscellaneous units with knowledge limited to finite data put on the university website. But I’m a cave dweller well past his use by date. I’m not past it though – if only because I never got there.
